Weightlifting

Words spoken from one to another to another to me.

These words sting, bring back the past, put me into another place and time.  They make me feel “righteous indignation”. 

I see a picture of the person who originally spoke these words, and I think a nasty thought about her.  And as I am looking at the picture, the words return to my heart and mind

I wonder why this person cannot see beyond the past….from what we were….to the present….who we are now…..and even further to who we may become.

These words, spoken on Friday, stay with me…fester within me….bring a feeling of lowness, sadness, unworthiness, shame and guilt. 

I have been here before–in these exact same places.  I know what to do, but can I?

Can I cry out to my Father and tell Him how I am feeling?  Can I unburden myself by burdening Him? 

My guilt overwhelms me—it is a burden too heavy to bear….Psalm 38:4

I carry this with me…carrying this and bowing under the weight upon me.  How long can I carry this?  Will I carry it forever?  Will others remember and only think these thoughts about not only me, but my family?

Common people are as worthless as a puff of wind, and the powerful are not what they appear to be. If you weigh them on the scales, together they are lighter than a breath of air….Psalm 62:9

Tears come to my eyes from time to time….tears of sorrow…..

We have moved on from this place many years ago.  Am I hiding my light under a basket so that others cannot see?

Last night–sitting outside in the darkness…close my eyes–quiet…..peace…..calm….serene….crickets chirping….aroma of honeysuckle…..small child laughing far below me…..

Open my eyes–fireflies all around in the darkness–their topaz flickering on and off….alighting first here, then there–too quickly for me to keep track.  There are so many–my own private fireworks celebration.

Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall….Psalm 55:22

The burden lifts–

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”….Matthew 11:28-30

Peace descends upon me–

For Jesus said:

“I am the way, the truth, and the life.  No one can come to the Father except through me.”…..John 14:6

Beth

 
 

 

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Chronos vs. Kairos

Our church had a series recently on rest.  We all need rest…a rest from our days work…the demands this can put upon us…..a rest from the stresses of this everyday world all around us…sometimes we even need a rest from ourselves.

But, how do we find this rest?

I am not fluent in Greek, but I did learn two words that are very important to me:

Chronos–This is measured time….the hands on the clock moving….the “I have to have this completed by 2 p.m.” time.  The bam, bam, bam of our everyday lives telling us to accomplish more, be more, the ‘get it done’ time. 

Kairos, on the other hand, is the ‘in between time’….a time that is indeterminate….a time where something special occurs…even for just a moment.  And, of course, kairos is totally dependent upon the person….what they see or hear or experience that is unique, special and important to themselves as an individual.

I have been ill this past week, and I realized this morning that I’ve spent most of my waking hours in kairos rather than chronos (except when I look at the clock and realize it’s time to take my medication).  I’ve enjoyed being here in this ‘land of inbetween time’. 

But, the illness improves–reality sets in–and I will have to return to chronos land.

So, my question is:  How to live a kairos life in a chronos world?  Is this possible?  Am I being totally optimistic in even hoping that this can occur?

Several weeks ago, I printed a note to myself and placed this on my computer monitor at work.  It simply says:  Chronos vs. Kairos–a reminder to myself that in the demands of the day–a day spent in chronos–that there are the kairos moments–those ‘inbetween times’–where something will strike me as special and unique

I typically start my day–every day–in kairos.  I sit on the deck with my first cup of coffee.  I listen to the birds awakening, I hear the geese honking, a barn owl saying his good nights to the world, purple petunias edged in white.  Close my eyes–my granddaughter holding a rock as if it were a diamond, the warmth of God’s love and His embrace surrounding me, the Shepherd caring for His lambs, the sun that I know is peeking through the darkness.  Yes, I could stay here forever.

Then the reality check–time to shower, time to dress and dry the hair, time to move along and out the door–and BAM–snap back to chronos.

I have come to the conclusion that it is possible to find kairos in our chronos world.  We just have to allow ourselves to look for it.  It is there, and perhaps we are missing it.  Perhaps we need to open our senses–all of our senses–our eyes, our ears, our taste, our touch, our intake of the aromas of this world–and just rest in the kairos–if even for a moment.

You see, we need these times–these ‘inbetween times’–where something special and unique can come into our lives.

Why?

Because the kairos sustains us through the chronos

Beth

 

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Surprise, Surprise!!

Today…..feeling slightly better….and I am so glad!!

Yesterday, my oldest daughter stopped over and did some cleaning that I haven’t been able to accomplish.  And, yes, she brought the love of my life with her:

She is getting so big…I couldn’t pick her up due to the pain in my abdomen.  But, she was content to look out the window at the cars going by and saying, “Car”, “truck”, “oooohhhh….too fast”.

After they returned to their home, I took a nap…a much needed nap since I’m trying to recuperate.

Around 6 p.m., a truck pulls into my driveway.  Out hops my youngest daughter with two friends.  They’re getting something out of the back of the truck bed and saying, “Surprise!!!”

My friend had gotten new patio furniture, and she contacted Lindsay who contacted Josh with the truck.  She gave me the patio furniture that she replaced….thus replacing my old, worn out set.  This had been planned for almost two weeks, and everyone kept mum about it.  That, in itself, was an even bigger surprise because my children are not very good at keeping these kinds of things to themselves. 

The furniture I did have was taken out to the road since today is trash day.  It found a new home within a matter of an hour when some one stopped with a trailer attached to their vehicle and loaded it up.  I hope the new owners enjoy their new patio furniture as much as I am going to enjoy mine.   Kind of a “pay it forward”, don’t you think?

I had gotten the globe that is sitting in the middle of the table a few months ago.  Along with this, came some citronella candles that fit into the bottom….very nice since the mosquitoes seem to be rather bad already this year.  I do enjoy sitting here in the evening….the peacefulness, the creek meandering by, but I do not enjoy being bitten and itchy.

And what can I say….my son then arrived and mowed my lawn!!

A spectacular day….even though I’m not feeling well.  All three of my children and my friend went the extra step to extend some love…..and isn’t that what life is all about?

Have a wonderful day in Him,

Beth

I’m back to bed after taking all my medication!!  June Giveaway still running until Monday night….winner will be announced on Tuesday!!

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Chicken Broth For The Ailment

So, I haven’t been feeling well since the weekend.  And, me…..I was thinking it was a GI bug that would run its course.

But, then Monday afternoon the pain started–the dull achy abdominal pain.   I went to the doctor yesterday–sent for yet another CT scan of my abdomen.

And yes, the diverticulitis is back–for the fourth time.  The sad part is that I did this to myself.

In trying to eat healthier, I was searching for bread in the grocery store.  “Ah, yes!!”, I say to myself.  “Here is some 12 grain bread–full of fiber–very good and healthy!!”  And I buy it.  And I eat it.

Eat this bread–not even thinking about all the little seeds that are in these 12 grains.  Seeds that get stuck in the diverticuli and then become infected causing the pain.

The good news is that none of these have abscessed–which can happen and is not a pleasant thing at all. 

On to two antibiotics at the same time, a clear liquid diet for about 4-5 days, and sparingly taking pain medication.  Why sparingly?  Because I cannot mask the pain in case this would get worse indicating above stated abscess.  I can only take the edge off the pain.

So, here I am…..having a cup of chicken broth for breakfast.  Very yummy!!  Anybody care for some?

Then back to bed to rest and recuperate…..

Have a good day in Him,

Beth

And the June giveaway is still on!!!

 

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Sunrise, Sunset

First cup of coffee on the deck……

A beautiful morning–the birds are chirping happily, geese are honking on the creek. 

What’s on my mind?

My children are on my mind, and this song came to me:

I just find it hard to believe that so many years have passed by in what seems to be the flash of a moment.

My son is now 30, daughters are 28 and 26…how did this happen?

My kids–growing up in a household that was not always filled with laughter but stress and arguments and yelling.

My kids–exposed to things that no one–much less a child–should be exposed to.

My kids–growing to be adults with some problems from their past–but we are steadily working on these and turning things around.  Yes, we backslide sometimes…say things we don’t really mean that hurt and sting…but, we love and are there for one another.  We are now quick to apologize and mend the wounded heart. 

My kids–what would I do without them? 

Yes, they are grown, but they are still my children and always will be, no matter their ages.

Remember to read the post below regarding the June giveaway!!

Have a wonderful day in Him,

Beth

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June Giveaway

And it is Monday…..again!!  How the days fly by so quickly!!

Well, I said I would be back yesterday with a giveaway, and I didn’t make it back.  So, here we are:

This giveaway will run this Monday morning from 5 a.m. (because I am an early riser) to 12 midnight on next Monday evening.  The winner will be picked and announced sometime on Tuesday.

I had something else in mind….sat down and worked on this said item yesterday….messed up on the measurements…so I’m on to Plan B.

This is going to be easy-peasy!!

First–

What am I giving away?

If you are the winner, you will receive two handmade dishcloths and hot pads in a coordinating color.  All you have to do is leave a comment stating your two favorite colors through the time frame mentioned above, and you’ll be in the running!!  Then, on Tuesday morning, I’ll put all the comments in a random number generator and pick the winner!!

I will then make the items and send them to you!!

Why am I doing this?

There are two reasons:

  • First–I tried a “Pay It Forward” a few weeks ago, and no one responded.  I’d like to be able to spread some love and joy around.  And after all, doesn’t everyone love to receive a surprise in their mailbox–something other than junk mail and bills? 
  • Second–Comments…..I’ve noticed as I’ve done some traveling around that many sites have a lot of views, but very few comments.  This is okay–read and move on.  And, I’m not saying that so I can come home from work and say to myself “Oh, look!!  I’ve gotten 20 comments!!”  No, that’s not it.

All I want to know is if something I’ve written has touched a place within your heart or mind…what your thoughts are….and then I can stop back and visit you–and leave a comment.  And let’s face it, aren’t we all in that same frame of mind?

That being said…..the giveaway for June begins!!

I’ll be doing one of these monthly….always something I’ve either made or is handmade.  July’s is all ready to go…and since it is to be used for the 4th of July, I’ll be doing this giveaway next week so you’ll have it in your hands by the 4th!!

Have a wonderful day in Him,

Beth

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From Frustration to Peace

Today is Sunday–a day which I spend in Sabbath rest.  But, I feel as though I took my Sabbath rest yesterday.

  • Tried to mow the lawn–couldn’t get the mower started after I couldn’t tell you how many tries–gave up…
  • Tried to clean the house–found I really wasn’t interested in doing this–gave up….
  • Tried to talk to my daughter on the phone–she was busy having conversations with two people in the background–gave up….
  • Tried to work on a few projects which only led to frustration–gave up….

After all of this “giving up”, I decided that perhaps Saturday was the day I would surrender the day to the Lord and have my Sabbath rest….instead of giving up on what I had intended to do, I gave up the day to Him.

All of the mentioned things above still need to be done.  But I spent the day yesterday in contemplation, prayer, tears, joy and eventually peace instead of frustration. 

Thank You, Lord….for guiding me away from the “things” that distract me from You and leading me into a day spent with You instead. 

All of that said, I do want to mention that I will be hosting a “giveaway”….nothing big…but, something I have made many of….given many to people I know…a useful item….

Not only that, but you can even choose your own color!!

I’ll be back later today with a picture of the item and details as to how to win.  I’m thinking of doing a “giveaway” once a month…something small…something handmade…we’ll see….

Have a wonderful day in Him,

Beth

 

 

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